How small communication choices shape your reputation

Every time you communicate with a customer, you make an impression, whether that communication is direct or a more casual, and seemingly less significant exchange. Communicating well also saves you time and money, because a clear message prevents the kind of confusion that costs you both. I want to walk through a situation with a client that shows how quickly a good impression can come undone.

My client had been in business for about 30 years. A newer service provider reached out and asked for her business. He was eager, and although a reference check showed he had struggled a little in recent years, my client decided to give him the work anyway. She had built her own business slowly and liked to see new business owners get a fair start. The terms were simple: payment would be made when the service was delivered. There was no set timeline, but my client paid every invoice within a day or two, knowing that prompt payment matters to a young business. For the first year, the arrangement worked well. He delivered on time and was quick to answer inquiries.

Things start to change

In the second year, the communication pattern shifted. He would commit to a delivery date and then change it. There was always a reason - a prior commitment, being out of town, etc. My client accepted the changes and attributed them to a new owner learning to manage his workload. She stayed with him and adjusted her own timelines so that a late delivery didn't throw off her plans.

The exchange that concerned her came over a specific weekend. The new business delivered the service and sent an invoice on a Friday at 4 p.m. The next morning, he followed up to ask for payment. My client replied that it seemed odd to be reminded of a payment when the invoice had been in her hands for less than a day, and proceeded to make the payment. The new business owner responded by saying the invoice should have been paid the night before and that he found her comment to be impolite, and then chastised her about good service being a two-way street. He added that he would send a paid copy of the invoice in the next few days.

The communication problems

The business owner's style of communicating had changed, and that inconsistency led to a different feeling for my client. Specifically:

• The timeline. Payment was due on receipt, and for the past year and a half, 24 to 48 hours had been acceptable.Certainly when an invoice arrives late on Friday, it would be normal practice that the following business day would be appropriate for payment. Chasing a payment on Saturday morning was not an expected request..
• The invoice. There had never been any terms on his invoices. After a dozen invoices paid within a day or two, my client had every reason to assume that timing was fine. If the expectation had changed, it was the business owner's duty to say so.
• The personal comment. Telling a customer she had been impolite added nothing to the business. The moment a message turns personal, it impacts how the person receiving that message feels about the relationship.
• The example. This time, the business owner expected an instant turnaround from my client, while giving himself several days to send a simple receipt. People notice when you hold them to a standard you will not hold for yourself.

The impression that was left

What the new business owner didn't know was that my client had been preparing to recommend him to three other potential customers. After that Saturday experience, she decided not to provide those recommendations. The inconsistent follow-up and the change of tone in the communication potentially cost him three pieces of referral (free) business.

People rarely announce the conclusions they draw about your actions. They simply stop calling, stop referring, or quietly decide to look elsewhere, and you are left wondering what happened.

The result

I advised my client to reply to the business owner’s personal remark with, "Thank you for your comments," and nothing more. That kept the door open if she wanted to continue to work with him, and closed it cleanly if she did not. It also protected her reputation, which is something that can be forgotten in a tense exchange. How you handle a difficult message says as much about you as it does about the person who initiated it. We often put a great deal of effort into the direct and intentional communications of a business and very little into the messages that occur indirectly or less intentionally. Those messages are where a good part of your reputation is built. Every time you communicate, you leave an impression. Pay attention to how you do it.