How to handle criticism on social media

When criticism hits on social media, the work is mostly on your own reaction. A few strategies help:

• Avoid hunting for negativity: Tim Ferriss's first rule is simply not to go looking for it, since combing through comments means fixating on the one or two cruel ones, like running barefoot across broken floorboards 1.
• Consider the source: Brené Brown's point is that the feedback worth taking seriously comes from people who are also in the arena, doing their own work and taking risks, not from someone making mean comments from the stands 3. A harsh, anonymous remark from someone who never puts their own work out there does not have to hold power over you.
• Respond with "yes, and": Communication coach Vinh Giang suggests that when a fair comment does land, you acknowledge it and build on it rather than defending yourself, which takes the heat out of the exchange 2.
• Work on your internal state: Criticism tends to sting only to the degree that part of you believes it or it hits an existing insecurity, so building emotional detachment helps you focus on what you can control.
• Accept that you cannot please everyone: Trying to please everyone usually ends up pleasing no one.